Hope Springs Eternal

I write this on the Spring Equinox (March 20th) when we move to equal amounts of day and night and note that this is viewed as the official start of Spring in the Northern hemisphere.  It is also seen as a time of new beginnings and I recently attended a workshop on garden writing as I am keen to integrate the garden or, indeed, Nature, into my work.  We were given a short topic of “Spring Bulbs” or writing more broadly on Spring and my perspective, shaped by my lens on the world, is set out below:  

‘Staying tuned into the world and the politics of the day is difficult to sustain, at present, as there is so much negativity.  Conflict seems at the heart of so many of the top news stories.  The global picture draws no comfort either, with a climate of fake news that is de-stablilising. 

So, where do we go to get some balance and respite?

One possibility surrounds us; it is to go into Nature.  Spring is one of the most hopeful of Seasons with plants and trees waking up from Winter’s slumber and the promise of the beauty held within starting to be released.  Step into Nature and stop for a while, with no distractions, and tune back into the rhythm of the world.  There is so much beauty that has survived another Winter when all looked bleak at times.  Nature, and particularly Springtime, teaches us lessons about resilience that we can transfer into our everyday lives.  Take a humble Spring bulb. If you planted one last Autumn then it may not have looked that inspiring.  Yet, within that bulb, was the energy to transform into perhaps a golden daffodil or a jewel-like tulip.  Contained inside each of us there is great potential that is often untapped, and this is where a deeper connection with Nature can help. 

The seasons never give up and are also present within us.  We have one life, and even if we feel that we are at the late Autumn or Winter of our days, we can still start something like a project or develop an idea which starts a new ‘internal’ season – perhaps a Spring time.  This can give us hope to sustain us in the unpredictable world within which we all live’.

If you are interested in attending a workshop that uses ‘the garden as therapy’ to deepen self-awareness and promote wellbeing then please get in touch with me via my email address below.  I should point out that this is not 1:1 therapy, but rather using the garden as a metaphor for understanding ourselves.  The workshop can be tailored to meet the needs or objectives of an organisation.

Margaret Walsh is a registered member of the British Association of Counselling & Psychotherapy, a Member of the Association of Coaching and a Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Personnel & Development.  She works with individuals and groups using a mixture of coaching and psychotherapy to help deepen self-awareness from which to bring about change.  She works face-to-face as well as by Skype and telephone and can be contacted on margaretwalshcoach@gmail.com

How self-doubt can develop into ‘Imposter Syndrome’

The quote below by Bertrand Russell (an early twentieth century Philosopher) is a comforting one to read if you are in the grip of self-doubt about your abilities and stalling action, as this may actually be a result of your superior intellect!

‘The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.’

Eventually, however, we do need to make a decision and doubt may make us procrastinate or be too timid in our decision-making.  We need to remember that self-doubt has its plus points in keeping us sharp, modest and thoroughly prepared.  Yet, it can also turn on us and make us feel like we do not deserve the success that we have achieved and, that one day soon, we will be found out.  This doubt can develop into Imposter Syndrome, a term that emanates from the work of clinical psychologists in 1978 – Dr Pauline Clance * and Dr Suzanne Imes (who referred to this Syndrome as Imposter Phenomenon).  

Imposter Syndrome can be described as feeling like a fraud and that we do not deserve the external success that comes our way.  Someone in the grip of Imposter Syndrome might attribute their achievements to luck; or being given a break and be fearful that one day they will be ‘found out’ or make a huge mistake.  It’s not easy to make decisions or feel good about yourself if this is the load that you carry. 

We live in a world where judgements are made about us all the time and these can be shared with large groups of people through our digital highways.  There are many images presented in the media of the perfect woman or man, be it looks or high achieving careers, that we often internalise.  This means we compare ourselves to the external ‘groomed and carefully polished’ version of success. We can then become sensitised to our own internal dialogue which can promote feelings of insecurity in our own abilities. 

The negative self-talk often associated with the Imposter Syndrome can hold us back and we can lose confidence in our own abilities and so forego promotions or work on high-profile projects for fear of not being ‘good enough’, even though we have ability to do a bigger, more challenging role. Sheryl Sandberg’s book ‘Lean In’ is very good at expressing the discomfort that can be present in the workplace, particularly for women, if you feel overlooked and the need to stand your ground to continue to ‘lean in’ so that your voice is heard.

Uncertainty is a feature of living today and most people have very little control over the outcome of, say, the Brexit negotiations or the policies of the US, both of which will have ramifications throughout the world.  Uncertainty can be stressful and to create confidence and resilience in ourselves to deal with the fast pace of change, we need to be alert to potential impact of Imposter Syndrome through staying connected to our own internal thoughts and feelings.

So, how do you manage Imposter Syndrome if you suspect you are affected by it?

It is useful to be aware of the patterns that you have grown up with and the messages from childhood that may linger and cause you to doubt your abilities.  For example, women are often given subtle messages from childhood about the traditional expectations of women. We are shaped indelibly by our upbringing and this sometimes lurks within us just outside of our conscious awareness but creates patterns to our behaviour.  The more we tune into those patterns, perhaps with the help of a coach who has the knowledge and skills to work at a deep level, the greater the likelihood of interrupting the negative self-talk that can put the brakes on the work we do or achieving our potential. 

Reflecting on achievements and allowing these to be properly absorbed is important activity for anyone who doubts their ability.  Good leaders and managers already know the power of good quality, regular feedback and using development activities to stretch and reinforce strengths.  Mentoring also has its place in learning how others manage their self-doubt to avoid Imposter Syndrome taking root. 

*There is an Imposter Phenomenon test and simple scoring system for personal use on Dr Pauline Clance’s web-site http://paulineroseclance.com/impostor_phenomenon.html to see how you rate yourself.

Margaret Walsh is a registered member of the British Association of Counselling & Psychotherapy, a Member of the Association of Coaching and a Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Personnel & Development.  She works with individuals and groups using a mixture of coaching and psychotherapy to help deepen self-awareness from which to bring about change.  She works face-to-face as well as by Skype and telephone and can be contacted on margaretwalshcoach@gmail.com